Dear Single Men…
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A response to Adebayo Adeniran’s open letter
How it started
Full disclosure, this article started out as a comment I was writing on Adebayo’s post regarding Misty Rae’s Open Letter to Single Middle-Aged Men.
Adebayo’s wrote a thoughtful and heartfelt, though somewhat strongly subtitled response —
As I typed my comment on Adebayo’s post, my words kept flowing and soon, I had left the realms of friendly appreciation. My words instead, rocketing towards some sort of essayist grandeur. So I adjusted course and decided to write this article. With the view to (hopefully), inspire some genuine discourse on the matter.
All credit to Adebayo for his genuine, meaningful and well-written open letter which inspired such a deep level of engagement from me. I’ve never been so motivated to respond with a comment let alone an article — first timer here.
I’m not here to agree or disagree with either author, simply add my thoughts to the conversation. On that, I’d like to thank both authors for sharing their thoughts.
It’s a subject I care deeply about and one I would consider myself as having some expertise on. Not least for being a woman but also the considerable experience I’ve had navigating this world and the sorts of behaviours Misty discusses in her article. I’ll summarise the core points —
1. Do Not Approach Us in the Supermarket
2. Do Not Approach Us in the Park
3. Do Not Approach Us At Work
4. Do Not Call Us MILFs, Comment on Our Asses or Other Attributes
My experience
I have encountered so much of this behaviour throughout my life. As of writing this, I’m a single woman in my thirties. Just two days ago, I sat quietly in the corner of my local break, watching the waves and journaling. I had come down for quiet and solace when two middle-aged men — 50+ — approached me for conversation.
